Dirty Laundry
They say clothes make the man. Interestingly, one of my earliest memories is running out of the laundry room — sans clothes — and into the backyard as my mom busied herself with washing and folding the mountain of laundry that seven kids have a tendency to generate. I’ve never felt so free in my entire life. Yet here I am, some fifty years later, wearing clothes everywhere I go and having to constantly wash them and dry them. The washing and drying machines that came with my house when I bought it almost 15 years ago are nearing the end of their useful lives, and I face the daunting task of shopping for replacement machines. It’s stressing me out. Oh, how I long for the carefree days of my youth, when clean clothes — or clothes at all — were far from my mind.
There are a few key choices to make (or have made for you) when selecting a washer and dryer. Is the dryer going to be powered by electricity or natural gas? (Electricity.) And should the washing machine be loaded from the front or the top? (I’ve decided to go with a front-load washer, for a variety of reasons, but mainly for aesthetics… I just like the symmetry when both machines have the same nice round window in front.) Then, of course, you have to decide on color. I remember awhile back candy-apple red machines were all the rage. I’m sort of a purist: washers and dryers should be white. As the laundry gods always intended.
So… I tell the appliance salesperson that I want a couple white electric machines with big round windows in front. See what she says.
Do I want wi-fi connectivity? Should I be able to control my laundering remotely with my smartphone? Is this just another way for the Guvmint to track my activity? Somehow, I think Joe Biden wants to know when I’m washing and drying and how much water I’m using. Then again, I do want a front-load machine in part because it uses less water. So… I’ve got that going for me.
At the end of the day, don’t we all just want clean clothes? There’s not much in life that’s more satisfying than climbing into a set of fresh-smelling clothes. I don’t much care about how it happens. I don’t need a ton of bells and whistles… frankly, a rock and a mountain stream would do just fine. But I’m far away from mountain streams, so I guess I need to just bite the bullet and purchase some new machines.
Or I could just buy another house.